"The reward of humility and the fear of Jehovah Is riches, and honor, and life. Thorns and snares are in the way of the perverse: He that keepeth his soul shall be far from them. Train up a child in the way he should go, And even when he is old he will not depart from it." (‭Proverbs‬ ‭22‬:‭4-6‬ ASV)

Relationship Reflection

  • Relationships are established when a connection is made between two people.
  • Sometimes the nature and the comfort of ability of a relationship can have some leverage when making decisions. My place of worship has a relationship with Pathmark, a neighborhood grocery store. Over the past 15 years, we've worked together, serving the community, feeding the hungry and aiding suffering humanity. Because of our consistency, Pathmarks gives us exemptions, and accommodates us with discounts and special arrangements.
  • Many relationships begun when we are children and only about one fourth of those connections continue. Some of us are blessed to grow and experience life's changes and challenges, together. I am thankful of two particular relationships that have lasted to this very day. My friends, Pam and Lavelle. I can't quite remember why or how Pam and I connected but it was very obvious that we, certainly, care for each other. As children, Pam and I were in so many pictures together, Birthday parities, playing outside, getting out hair done together. Today, as adults, we have a greater love for our families, a positive outlook on life and we both love to serve others. Lavelle was my first boyfriend. I was 14 and he was 13. He was visiting his aunt that lived in my neighborhood. I remember seeing how he stood up for other people, was nice and very funny. Today, Lavelle is a wonderful father, still possess that willingness to defend anyone, has a humorous personality and such a positive outlook on life, no matter what hand has been to dealt to us
  • My relationship with Lavelle has proven that men and woman can obtain a healthy and platonic relationship without romance.
  • Relationships are evidence of the positive energy we put out. Sometimes we connect and sometimes we don't. There's an old saying. "Love thy neighbor as thyself" I think this is a perfect ingredient to a health, and strong relationship.
  • Making a connection is the key!!!

Words of Inspiration and Motivation

“ five and six year old children are inheritance of poverty’s curse and not its creators. Unless we act, these children will pass it on to the next generation, like a birthmark.” (1987)

Lyndon B. Johnson

Bachelor degrees are best: Higher qualifications for all kindergarten teachers lead to better learning environment for children. (Laureate Education)

Marcy Whitebook, Ph.D

“My Passion was to make sure that all children were taught in environments and in ways that truly nurtured their ability to grow and to develop to their fullest ability.” (2010)

Louis Derm-Sparks
Professor Emeritus
Pacific, Oak College, CA

Personal Childhood Web

Personal Childhood Web
Khari Roulhac (cousin)

Khari Roulhac (cousin)

Khari is my favorite cousin. I remember when we were introduced to each other as cousins, and just as I felt lucky to have such a cool person to have been a part of my family then, is the same way I feel today. We have so much in common. We come from the same family. We are close in age. We were brought up in “not the best” inner city neighbors (Philadelphia and Boston) but managed to escape the stereotypical statistics of becoming delinquents and rebels of our community. We, both, have a yearning and appreciation of our family and spending time together is always the major objective. I could think of a million and one ways that Khari has shown he cares and love but there is one particular circumstance that sticks the most. After I lost my job and then eventually my house, he managed to get away from his engrossed schedule to pack me up, pick me up and moved me to Boston. He has influenced me through his great achievements in life. He has a Master’s degree in Education; he’s married with three beautiful children, home owner, a positive role model and active in his community. Although, he is a few years younger than I am, I look up to him and I share my aspirations with him for his approval. When I grow older, I want to be just like him but most importantly I want him to be proud of me.

Personal Childhood Web

Personal Childhood Web
Tia Martin (Great Aunt )

Tia Martin (Great Aunt )

My Great- Aunt Tia was the sister of my grandfather. I would visit her every summer in Manning, South Carolina. I remember how she would greet me when we would first arrive. I went to Manning up to the age of 10 or 11 years old but I remember how I felt every time we drove up into the drive way of the house. She would call to my grandfather “Go-van(nickname)” and then ask for me. My first step out of the car would always end up in Aunt Tia’s arms. She would squeeze me to death and mention how skinny and frail I was and how she was going to fatten me up. I understood that she meant well and I knew that she loved me. I would sit with her for hours and hours, watching her and learning to cook and bake. She has influenced me, greatly, through the love and energy she always puts forth to having her family get togethers, and she always hosted at her house. Even, today, Ill cook food for days, so that ill have enough for everyone and so that everyone is able to come and be with each other.

Personal Childhood Web

Personal Childhood Web
Makia Tillman (cousin)

Makia R. Tillman (cousin)

This is my cousin Makia Tillman. Although, our visits were far and in between, when we did get together, we made up for lost time. Makia and I were second cousins. She lost the fight to cancer this past winter. She was a very loving and thoughtful person. She was enthusiastic about family and what we did as a family. She and I were considered to be close, although, we didn't speak every day we stayed connected in other ways. We traveled together; we liked the same music, shared some of the same friends and even belonged to the same religious organization. She has nurtured me as a cousin in so many different ways. Cousins are usually children’s first true friends. Her phone calls, letters, invitations to meet her in other cities, all showed her love for me. Her influences of furthering her education, certainly, had a great impact on my life. She climbed that ladder of success and academic achievement all the way up to her obtaining her Doctorate degree in Education. I want to keep her memory alive by reaching some of those same achievements.

Elisha

Elisha
Children never ceases to amaze me. Elisha is 21 months old. Although, I was very much aware that he could identify his shapes, I wasn't aware that he could actually draw them. Here is Elisha drawing circle after watching me draw it only a few times.

Deborah

Deborah
Here I am 7 years old in the second grade. I remember this day as if it were yesterday.

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice, and Oppression


I have a younger cousin who is very attractive, in fact, she’s beautiful.  Two years ago she graduated and went off to college.  Her father is one of my favorite cousins, is very instrumental in her life, very knowledgeable when it comes to “street smarts” and is a great history buff.  His daughter is beautiful, and very intelligent and a very kind hearted person.  Immediately, after she moved into the dorms, she met someone.  The guy, had tattoos for days, everywhere! Wore his hat backwards, pants half way down, and just about every picture he took, he never had a shirt on.  When her dad saw these pictures, it was War War III.  He was livid and some of us, as concerned family members.   After a while, these two became inseparable.  We learned to love him and we accepted him.  This year, my family is visiting Martha’s Vineyard, he is planning to propose to her.   There are so many things they have accomplished together.  However, we chose to condemn him before we got to know him.  Those micoaggressions of our own internalized oppression's of the stereotypical “bad boy” entered our minds when we saw the picture of him with all the tattoos and the hat wearing backwards, without the shirt on.  We immediately judged him as being the total opposite of who is really is.  He’s hard working, edger for education, respectful, funny, and loves my cousin til the end of the earth.    It certainly would have been a misfortune if she would have listened to her family members and disregarded this young man.
My feelings about how we misjudge this young man are quite naturally, sad.  The sad thing about it, is how often do we do this? How often does this happen in everyday life, interviews, customer service, business transactions, or just regular conversations.   As educators we should want to recognize and alleviate any of these internalized oppression's, so that we become free of these biases and better teachers, and more diversified.    

This scenario turned out to be successful and no hard feelings were felt and but what about the couple whose family members didn’t like her/him, how did their relationship work out?  What bias or stereotypes or prejudices were pass on considering them.  We just have to be cognizant of what we say and how we think.  
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